sometimes when i close my eyes...

i picture myself somewhere like these pictures.

pictures i took of the countryside in hawaii

i am in the midst of a lot of decisions. big decisions.

i am standing in this big, wide, open space & there are thousands of directions i could go.

even the tiniest shift in my place would take me in an entirely different direction.

this is exactly where i'm at in life right now. i am twenty years young. but this is the time when the biggest decisions are made.

& at this point in my life i'm not very limited. i have the world at my fingertips (okay, maybe not the world... because money is limiting. but you know what i mean). so, where to go from here?

i'm not exactly the quickest decision maker... i tend to over-think things a lot. 

i write so many pros & cons and analyze them to the point that i'm even more confused.

but after thinking so very much lately i have found that there just may not be one right decision or direction to take.

how will i ever know that the decision i make is right or wrong? i won't. because i will never know the difference of my decision; whether the other choice would have been better or not. and that is a good thing because no matter what comes out of each decision i make; i will always learn something from it. i will gain new experiences & hopefully be better equipped for the next time it's time to change directions & make another decision. 

and even though it seems sometimes like i have no idea what to do next... i know that deep down i will always know what i truly want to do and what i think would be best for me. i just need to stop thinking with my head & trust myself. 

thanks for baring with me through my mess of jumbled thoughts.  

i came across this quote today on this lovely blog. it pretty much sums it all up.

some stories don't
have a clear beginning,

middle, and end. life

is about not knowing,

having to change,

taking the moment and 

making the best of it,

without knowing what's 

going to happen next.

delicious ambiguity...

-gilda radner